How to Share an Obituary: Text, Email and Facebook Messages

Once the family has approved the obituary, a short message with the link is often the quickest way to let people know. Here is wording for texts, group chats, email and social media, and what to check before you press send.

Messages you can copy

Replace the text in brackets. Short is better: people need to know what happened, where to find the details and what, if anything, the family would like them to do.

A text to a relative or friend

Hi [Name], I'm sorry to tell you that [Full name] died on [date]. The obituary and service details are here: [link]. Thank you for thinking of our family.

If this will be the first they hear of the death, call first if you can and send the link afterward.

A family group chat

Here is the obituary for [Full name]: [link]. Please keep it within the family for now. We are still calling relatives and close friends, and we will let you know when it can be shared more widely.

An email to family and friends

Subject: Remembering [Full name]

Dear family and friends,

We are sad to share that [Full name] died on [date]. The obituary and service details are here: [link]. [If you would like, you can leave a memory in the guestbook on the page.]

Thank you for your kindness and support.

[Your name or the family's name]

Put the person's name in the subject line so people recognize the message. For a long list, use BCC unless everyone has agreed to share their address.

A message for a workplace, congregation or club

I am writing on behalf of the [Surname] family. [Full name] died on [date]. The obituary and service details are here: [link]. Please feel free to share this with anyone in [group] who knew [Name].

A public Facebook post

With heavy hearts, we share that [Full name] died on [date]. The obituary and service details are here: [link]. We would love to read your memories of [Name]. Please feel free to share this post.

Keep the last sentence only if the family welcomes wider sharing. Check who can see the post before you publish it, and do not tag relatives without asking them.

For people who already know

For those asking, here is [Name]'s obituary with the service details: [link]. Thank you for your kindness and support.

This works as a reply to condolence messages, or for a group that has already heard the news.

When service arrangements are not final

We have shared an obituary for [Full name]: [link]. Service arrangements are not final yet. We will send another message as soon as the date and place are confirmed.

Then make sure someone sends that follow-up, through the same channels. People should not have to keep checking the page.

When a detail changes

An update about [Full name]'s service: it will now be [new date, time or place] instead of [previous detail]. The updated details are here: [link]. Please pass this on to anyone you invited.

On obituary.design, you can request changes to a published obituary by email, free of charge, as explained in the FAQ. Tell the people affected directly as well: screenshots, printouts and downloaded PDFs do not update themselves.

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Who to tell first

A link reaches many people at once, but it is a hard way to learn that someone has died. A useful order is to work outward:

1. Immediate family and the closest friends, by phone or in person. Send the link afterward.
2. Extended family and close friends, with a personal text, call or email.
3. Colleagues, neighbors, church or club members, often through one person who passes the message on to the group.
4. A public post, last, and only once the family agrees.

It helps to choose one person to coordinate: someone who answers questions, sends follow-up messages and asks for corrections. That keeps the service time and donation details the same in every message.

Let the family read it before you share

Before an obituary is finished, ask one or two relatives to read it: names and spellings, dates, and who is listed among the survivors. On obituary.design you can send a preview link to family or trusted friends while you are still working on the obituary. Anyone with the preview link can view it for 48 hours. Once everyone agrees, finish the obituary and share the final link, not the preview.

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Sharing an obituary privately

Some families prefer to send the obituary only to people they know instead of listing it publicly. On obituary.design, the private option keeps the obituary out of the public directory, and people reach it through the link you send them.

Private means unlisted, not password-protected. Anyone who has the link can open the page, and anyone can forward it, copy the text or take a screenshot. A short request helps:

We have created an obituary for [Full name]: [link]. We are sharing it directly with family and close friends. Please ask us before forwarding the link or posting it publicly. Details of the private gathering will follow separately.

That request relies on goodwill, not on a setting. Write the page so that an unexpected reader would not learn anything the family considers confidential. Send a home address for a private gathering, personal phone numbers or health details in a separate message instead.

Other ways to share from the obituary page

Every obituary.design page has buttons to share it on Facebook, WhatsApp, Facebook Messenger and by email, plus a button to copy the link. A few other options help people who prefer paper or do not use social media:

• QR code. Download a QR code for the page and print it on funeral programs or thank-you cards. Scanning it with a phone opens the obituary.
• PDF and image. Download a print-ready PDF or an image to print at home, add to a program or send to someone who prefers paper.
• Guestbook. If you turn on the guestbook, people can leave memories below the obituary. Entries are visible on the page, and you receive an email for each one with an option to remove it.

Check before you press send

• Open the link yourself and confirm it is the final obituary, not a 48-hour preview link.
• Check names, dates, times, the venue and any livestream or donation links.
• If you invite people to leave a memory, make sure the guestbook is turned on.
• Keep private addresses and personal phone numbers out of public posts.
• Agree who will handle corrections and follow-up messages.

Still writing the text? Our obituary examples and free Word templates can help. If you are deciding whether to place a notice in the paper as well, see online obituaries vs. newspaper.